Dear agony ant,

I’ve just been tested for STI’s and have found out that I have chlamydia. I’m slightly shocked as I’ve been a one man koala for some time now and it raises serious questions as to my partner’s fidelity. While koalas are not usually monogamous, it is something we decided to try out. Am I crazy for going against our natural instincts and expecting too much?


Koala, Phascolarctos cinereus


Dear Koal-mydia

Firstly, it’s great to see that you are being proactive about your sexual health.  Many koalas are too scared to get tested for chlamydia and going untreated can lead to many terrible consequences, including infertility and blindness. Early detection is key. With regards to your partner, while I understand it is within your  ‘instincts’, if there has been a clear discussion defining your relationship then you certainly have the right to feel upset about the situation. I suggest you confront him and be clear about your expectations; if he cannot commit to this, it may be time to part ways.  If you feel it’s time to cut all ties, then at least feel satisfied by the fact that he will have to notify all his past sexual partners to get tested for chlamydia, which will be a fun task indeed.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s