Cane toads are people too

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Dear agony ant,

On a recent trip to north-west Australia, I was shocked to hear of the anti-cane toad sentiment in that part of the world. Not only did I see negative paraphernalia littering the streets, but I also witnessed a man bludgeoning a fellow toad to death with a cricket bat! We have lived in this beautiful land for nearly a century now and call it home. While I understand we have had our impacts on the environment, we are no more invasive than colonising humans! In the age of multiculturalism and equality, how can such blatant speciesism exist?

Cane toads are people too,

Cane toad, Rhinella marina

Dear Cane toads are people too,

While we pretend to welcome all to our country, too often the question is, what can you do for us? No-one would begrudge the 25 million cows a home in Australia, especially when they are providing such sweet, sweet treats for us all. While the introduction of your species was certainly not the most successful of endeavours, it is true that we now need to find a way to live in harmony.  What I hear in your letter is a common love for the land upon which we live, and with some discussions, I believe we could reach some agreement on how we preserve our native species while giving you your basic toad rights. At the same time, perhaps a little less plundering on your part could go a long way to repairing human-toad relations. Otherwise, you can make cheese, can’t you?

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